EFT and depression

June 27th, 2009 Jessica Posted in depression, lifting depression | 1 Comment »

I was watching videos of EFT technique this morning and I came across a video compilation of testimonials for EFT. It shows three people who have experienced relief from long term depression after working with an EFT practitioner. EFT is short for Emotional Freedom Technique, and it is a system of tapping on specific points of the face and hands. I am only just learning about it for the first time this year. This video fits right in with the aim of Live on Purpose, and that’s why I’m including it here. It’s a technique to dissolve the intensity of emotions surrounding your issues.

Here is a video with an explanation of how to do EFT from an advanced practitioner.

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Should I become a Twitter Background designer

June 23rd, 2009 Jessica Posted in purposeful living | 4 Comments »

Since I began my Twitter account in December 08, I’ve noticed that some people like to have a special Twitter background that offers their contact information and business name, along with a slogan.  Since Twitter is a networking tool, having a background image that reflects your business model helps your potential followers understand about you in a glance.

I’ve seen several companies that specialize in designing Twitter backgrounds for people/businesses, and now I wonder if I should begin designing Twitter backgrounds for a fee.

I love running Live on Purpose, but it costs me money to do so. I have yearly hosting fees and monthly newsletter broadcasting fees, as well as the costs incurred in producing, editing, and holding the affiliate program for the ebook. I would love to be able to offer my readers a service that is needed and that I enjoy doing, that can be done relatively quickly. (And believe me, if I were to go into freelance web design, I’d never have any free time. Web sites take lots of time to build)

So, I’m opening this blog post to a conversation about charging for Twitter backgrounds.  Here are some resources to show what is currently available. Some designers charge, some web sites offer free backgrounds that users then further customize.

http://twitterbackgroundsgallery.com/featured-designers/ This is a gallery to show how some people customize their Twitter Backgrounds.

http://www.twitterimage.com/ Wow, this one charges $100!

http://freetwitterdesigner.com/ Awww, this one is free but users design it themselves from stock images.

http://www.twitterbackgrounds.com/custom-twitter-backgrounds This one charges $99.

My personal Twitter background took an hour or two to design and tweak. I’d do the pro backgrounds in a higher screen resolution so they would look good in browsers on larger screens.

http://twitter.com/liveonpurpose

Well, after doing that quick tour of background suppliers, I can see why they charge $100. If a designer’s normal fee is $50 an hour and one background can take two hours or more of design time as well as the time spent in communication with the client and tweaking the design, then that $100 is well earned.

What do you think? Would you pay that much for a custom Twitter background design?

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Test driving a hybrid

June 16th, 2009 Jessica Posted in purposeful living | 4 Comments »

I have an amazing story to tell. A social media group contacted me to ask if I would like to test drive a car in exchange for talking about it on my blogs. The only kind of car I would have been interested in talking about is a hybrid. I recycle, I went to the Denver Green Event this year to learn about sustainability, and I’ve talked about recycling in this blog post: Sustainable Dave.

Even though hybrid cars have huge batteries that can pollute landfills with corrosive materials (but not if they are recycled properly), and even though they still use gasoline for fuel, I think they are a step in the right direction for today’s world. To me, it’s a purposeful choice. So, I was allowed to test out the 2009 Mercury Mariner Hybrid for a week. I’ve never driven an electric car or a hybrid, and I’m not much of a car buff in general, but since I am a webmaster, I know graphic user interface (GUI) and I know usability.

hybridThis car was delivered on a Wednesday. A driver dropped it off and had me sign some forms that said I’d always wear my seat belt, refrain from taking the car out of country, and lock the car when I leave it. This was a brand new experience for me, and I was a little nervous! Is everything legit? I wondered.

I used the car right away to do about six estimates for our guttering company. As soon as I got in, I could tell this was a high tech car, with an inboard navigation system/computer, and enough buttons to make one think it’s an airplane cockpit.

I brought my cell phone, my normal wall-plug recharger (because there is an electric motor, you can recharge anything in the normal outlet provided), all my paperwork, and I could even fit a fold-up ladder in the back. My twelve year old son and husband came along for this trip, too.

“What’s the name of that movie, son? It’s where a man gets contacted by a computer on his cell phone?” I asked.

That was the only thing I could remember of this movie we had seen the year before. Luckily, we mind-melded, and my son knew what I was talking about.

“Oh, you mean Eagle Eye?” He went on to explain that a man was holding a suitcase for half the movie and when he finally go to open it there were two guns to give yourself a shot so you could withstand staying in the cargo bay of an airplane.

Then I remembered the rest of the movie. A man and woman were chosen by a computer to travel to DC to watch the woman’s son play in an orchestra for congress at the Kennedy Center. The computer concocts these wild adventures to get them to an airport, including calling them on strangers’ cell phones and saying “Obey if you want to live,” then giving on-the-fly commands for their next move.

So, when my own cell phone first rang when we test drove the Mariner, I was half-expecting a flat female voice to say, “Obey if you want to live. Take your next left.” (insert soft laugh track here.)

This hybrid uses the energy generated by applying the brakes to recharge its own electric motor. Low speed driving is managed with the electric motor and high speed driving is managed with the gas engine. I can’t hear the switchover in city driving. When I drive uphill, the tachometer swings from 2 to 4 and the owner’s manual advised this is normal. When I drive downhill, the tachometer stays at 2.

hybridcontrolpanelI’ll tell a story from that first day of driving in this post, and will post some more later in the week. My husband, who is a rough around the edges construction worker with very little computer experience, thought this car would be too delicate for him. He’s used to driving the gas guzzling pickup trucks that look like monster trucks and sound like a bus. He was amazed that the Mercury Mariner Hybrid is silent when it idles, so it took some getting used to not turning the key three times trying to hear the engine. He could not figure out the navigation system on his own so relied on me to enter addresses and start/stop routes. He thought he’d break the electric system in a week if it was his own car; If not from spilling drinks on the panel, then from smashing the panel when he got frustrated! :)

However, since I’ve been using computers for well over a decade, I had an easy time understanding the basic user interface.

You can set an address when not moving. The computer talks you through it easily. I have a separate navigation unit I’ve been using for a year. On the Garmin, the voice sounds ticked off when you deviate from the course. She says, “Recalculating…” as soon as you miss a turn. This voice doesn’t do that. She lets you get off the highway if you feel like it, then recalculates silently, and tells you what to do next to stay on course. There are settings panels where you can turn the voice commands on or off, you can set route preferences like “avoid highways” and you can even see how the car is doing with miles per gallon in real time.

I’m going to leave all the numbers for another post, because I’ve just returned from a journey of a thousand miles today.  This car performed very well for the trip, and I was pleased with it. It made me feel cosmopolitan and classy.  I’ll make subsequent posts with more details.

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Meet SARK Succulent Wild Woman

June 9th, 2009 Jessica Posted in depression, lifting depression, mood-food, purposeful healing | 4 Comments »

I have recently found the author SARK, which is an acronym for Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy. So many people who participated in the call where I met her were raving about how she changed their lives; so I decided to go to the library to check out her books. I found two: Transformation Soup and Succulent Wild Woman. She’s authored plenty more, and all are hand written (that’s right, handwriting! She didn’t choose a font, unless someone decided to turn her handwriting into a font and call it SARK) with little drawings interspersed through the pages.

If you are on a healing journey in your life, I’d recommend her book Transformation Soup: Healing for the Splendidly Imperfect written in 2000. It starts out:

My mother is no longer the problem…now what?

And SARK explains about how she dedicated her early life to blaming her mother for her problems. She experienced abuse as a child and spent 9 years in psychotherapy on her own healing journey. At one point her therapist suggested that she stop talking about her mother during therapy! Her response:

I felt like I’d fallen out of a plane without a parachute, and finally managed to say, “What will we talk about then?”

Transformation Soup then goes on to explore the different healing modalities SARK has come across as she describes them with wit, wisdom, humor and pun-ny drawings. This book will help you during your own healing journey, for sure.

Succulent Wild Woman: Dancing with Your Wonder-full Self from 1997 is a book about exploring your creativity from all angles, but there are bits of everything in this book, and it’s quite hard to say what it’s about! Journaling, love, self-acceptance, erotic robots, feeling safe, being alone, how to paint, healing, motherhood, body image….this book really is an exploration.

On the call from thewomenmasters.com, SARK said, “All growth comes in spirals and layers.” That’s what I was aiming for when I designed my spiral shell wallpaper. (Use that link to go to the main wallpapers page and scroll to the 2 with shells on them: the 3rd and 4th from the top.) SARK clarifies what self-love is: you loving you so you can love the world more. Also, she said she supports people learning about their biochemistry as a way to heal oneself.

That’s what I was going for when I wrote Sad For No Reason. People go to therapy for years and years; some show great progress while others show little to none. Why? Is it the extent of the damage done in the first place during tender formative years? Or is the lack of progress due to biochemical deficiencies that short-circuit our brains’ ability to heal iteslf and accomplish creative problem solving? This is what I explore in Sad For No Reason. What I found astounded me and I hope it will astound you, too. When given the appropriate amino acid supplements and when the diet is cleaned up, the very people who struggled with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, or irritability for years with no progress during psychotherapy, could suddenly make leaps and bounds of progress in counseling.

Back to SARK! She has now become the self-proclaimed master of re-framing problems; so much so that she jokingly said her next store will be called “SARK’s ReFrame Shop”. You stop in, tell her your problem, and she’ll re-frame it into some kind of opportunity. That’s the trick; to find the opportunity within your current problems. So, say your creative dreams out loud, hug yourself daily, use her web site PlanetSark and her daily inspiration telephone line (1-415-546-3742 for a recorded message from SARK) and continue your journey to becoming a Succulent Wild Woman (or man).

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What to do with anger

May 29th, 2009 Jessica Posted in depression, emotions and health, lifting depression | No Comments »

Angry coupleDepression is sometimes the result of unresolved anger. Anger can be tricky, because sometimes it manifests as constant crying, so you think you’re sad or depressed. This was the case for me, when I was in my teens and twenties.  I thought I never got angry. However, I cried many times a month.  Today I had a tiny breakthrough, and I want to share the general process with you, without the details.

You can have a staring contest at your anger until it backs down. I just figured out that I spent a decade changing my behavior to avoid my husband’s anger and I’ve been expecting him to do the same for me, like it’s noble or something. My insight is that when I get angry, I expect others to say, “I can’t stand to see you this way; if it means that much to you, I’ll stop the behavior.”

That’s how it happens on TV, right?

But no such thing has happened in my life, yet I still continue feeling anger when I see behavior I don’t like in my husband. If my anger does not change his behavior, isn’t it just hurting ME? Isn’t it just driving him to secrecy? My family leaves me alone when I’m angry. Who wants to cross paths with a charging rhino? Nobody comes to pat my back and make me feel better; that’s up to me. So, here’s how I did it today:

I looked at my anger like it was an object. I became curious about the anger itself. Could I see any patterns? Was this anger helping me? Oh, I knew there were four questions I was supposed to ask….what the heck were they? I couldn’t remember them. But I remembered that husband and I were both expecting our anger to change someone else’s behavior. By looking at my anger this way, I shifted my focus from the person/behavior I was angry AT to the anger itself. Then it left. My anger simply dissolved. It took me 20 minutes. Now I can focus on the rest of my day.

Working with anger this way to dissolve it does not mean I endorse the behavior that got me riled up in the first place. It doesn’t make me an enabler to that behavior, either. The phrase, “I’m in charge of my anger” doesn’t mean that I have to sweep it under the rug, hoping it never comes out. It does mean that I have a responsibility to turn my anger into something constructive in my life and not let it gnaw at my mind and knot my muscles for weeks.

I think it’s time for a massage.

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Us and Them

May 19th, 2009 Jessica Posted in emotional guidance system, purposeful living, purposeful thinking | No Comments »

As I was listening to the recorded interview of Micheal Neal and Bill Cumming on The Big Chat, I was reminded of a blog post I made in the summer of 2005.

Bill was telling a story about his mentor, and one day he had made a statement to the effect of, “I hate bigots.” His mentor Mr. Boothby quickly corrected him: “That would make you the problem. Unless we learn to love the bigot this (struggle) will never change.” Every group of people needs to know that their value in the world is a given; it does not have to be achieved.

Here is the story I remembered upon hearing this:

You People from my older blog The Pixellator: Up Close, 2005

I took a customer call today at work and input the sale. Once it processed, the customer engaged me in a conversation. He told me all about how A.A. had changed his life, that he’s on a mission to “convert” more alcoholics, and how he, in the back of his mind, kind of wished there were more alcoholics so he could teach A.A. methods to them. Then he went on to describe how he thinks Christians can never understand the depths of despair and darkness that the worst alcoholics endure, and he said, “You people will never understand…”. I had not disclosed to him what my religious beliefs were. I asked him point blank, even interrupting him mid-sentence, “who do you mean by ‘you people’?”

He replied, “Could I call it namby-pamby Christians?”

I stopped listening to him, but he went rambling on, and I signaled for my coworker to make the phone ring!

Now, here is my reply, which I seem to always think of way too late to be of any use.

Once a person allows his mind to separate himself from others by classifying people into groups, he becomes blinded to the fact that we are all unified as a group called Humans.

We all like to rationalize about how people are. What that does is allow us to distance ourselves from the incredibly hard work of self-criticism. Please, everyone, when you catch yourself thinking, “you people,” let that be a signal to yourself that you have some introspection to do!

This little story still rings true for me; no matter the differences between two groups of people, as long as they separate themselves into “us” vs. “them” our dualistic, therefore combative, world-view will dominate.

I have been interacting with some teenagers in recent years, and some of them seem to think that “respect” has to be earned. As in: someone else has to do or be something worthy for them to give their respect. Perhaps that’s true in gangsta movies, where the druglord uses domination tactics to intimidate people into submission, but it’s not really respect; it’s fear.

I think respect is something you give to all humans by virtue of being alive. Admiration is earned.

A person’s value, their self-worth, is not to be tied up in the things they have or do, it’s just a given. Your value to the world is intrinsic to you, by virtue of being a human.

So, back to the us and them mentality.

Why do I have introspection to do when I blame another group for the problems in the world?

When you put it this way, isn’t it a little clearer that “us and them” is another version of the blame game? And when we blame others for our problems, we are sidestepping our personal responsibility to own our problems. Blame mentality is easier on the mind of the accuser than introspection.

This blog post does not offer solutions to anybody’s problems. I’m simply offering a new view: take the shift in mentality to look inside yourself first. See if you’re genuine, or elitist, or judgemental, or whatever. Then watch that part of you, don’t condemn it.

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Edible Plants Gradeschool Report

May 16th, 2009 Jessica Posted in mood-food, purposeful healing, purposeful thinking | No Comments »

I’m going on a lark here, and I’ve decided to share a report I wrote in the sixth grade. “What the heck could be so special about a sixth grade report,” you ask? This particular report recently surfaced in my life, and I was surprised and proud to re-read it.

As you may know, I offer the ebook Sad For No Reason: How to Use the Mood-Food Connection to Banish Depression Naturally. I came to write this book because I love the subject of natural health care, and I believe deeply that everyone needs to be educated about the types of foods that will help or hinder their health.

I found the following report in a box of old school papers. It confirms that I have been interested in this subject nearly my whole life. The teacher, Mrs. Mills, let us pick any subject we wanted to research, and she probably gave us a month to complete the work. I would have been eleven or twelve years old when I researched and wrote it. I’ve typed it exactly as I wrote it, and I included (sic) after my original errors. I could have stopped after chapter one. I have no idea what drove me to add chapter two about deadly mushrooms. I suppose I wanted to give a well-rounded view of wild plants; some are edible and some are poisonous.

The Wild World of Edible Plants

Please use this link to scan the report. I typed it up and included scans of the illustrations and a handwriting sample to show that even in the sixth grade, I gave one hundred percent to the subjects I was interested in. I tended towards perfectionism, and went above and beyone the teacher’s expectations. That’s the kind of effort I put into my ebook Sad for No Reason.

Edible Plants

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What is a Divine Life Purpose?

May 13th, 2009 BrightMichelle Posted in purposeful living, purposeful thinking | 2 Comments »

What is a Divine Life Purpose? By Guest Blogger Michelle Casto

Who am I? Why am I here? What is my purpose in life? These are some of the oldest and most important questions posed by human beings throughout history. They become the most profound when an individual such as yourself begins to think and reflect on them. Upon reading this workbook and doing some soul-searching, you will discover your own unique answers to these important questions. The word purpose means to have intentional results. When we are on purpose, we are making a conscious effort to be or create something. Usually what we really want to be or do seems out of reach, “impossible.” But we must remember that the word “impossible” with an apostrophe is actually I’m (I am) possible. And you are!

Dudley Lynch and Paul Lordis in their book Strategy of the Dolphin said this: “We can define “purpose” in several ways. For one, when we know our purpose, we have an anchor— a device of the mind to provide some stability, to keep the surprises of a creative universe from tossing us to and fro, from inflicting constant seasickness on us. Or we can think of our purpose as being a master nautical chart marking shoals and rocks. Perhaps the most profound thing about “being on purpose” is that when that is our status, our condition, and our comfort, we find our lives have meaning, and when are “off purpose” we are confused about meanings and motives.”

A clearly defined life purpose provides meaning, direction, and significance. Your life purpose answers two essential questions: Who do I want to be? & What do I want to do? When we are living from our true soul’s purpose, we feel more alive—filled with excitement, joy, and inner peace—in a word “contentment.” We are more connected to one another as human beings and more content with who we are and what we do.

When we are “on purpose” we tap into a higher power, we have supernatural support! The best things in life seem to be naturally attracted to us. When we are not on purpose, we try to do it all alone! We grasp at straws, every thing looks good—whether it is a new job, going to school, moving, finding another lover—anything to fill the void of the extreme emptiness we feel inside. Not being on purpose leads to constant seeking— external things to make you feel more fulfilled. Being on purpose leads to effortless contentment—an internal peace with what is unfolding in your life. You have a feeling of “all is right with the world” and I have an important part to play!

Every human being has the universal purpose of learning how to love more. Every human begin has his or her unique purpose of helping to heal our planet and other people. Planet Earth is the ultimate university for our souls, where you have the task of learning your lessons, showing love, and sharing gifts. You can evolve yourself by understanding, accepting, and taking action to live out your universal and unique life purposes.

You were born to do something specific. A role and opportunity was entrusted to you and you alone. If you don’t know your life purpose, you are still a diamond in the rough. Discovering one’s life purpose is like cutting a diamond. Every gem quality diamond has within it a ready-made design, waiting to be discovered. So do you. The secret is to discover and actualize your unique pattern. Like a diamond needs to be excavated to have worth, you have to dig deep within yourself to discover your unique life purpose.

Get help with discovering your life purpose:
http://www.brightlightcoach.com/purpose-ebook.html

Michelle Casto is the Soul Coach, Spiritual Teacher, and Modern-day Philosopher. Visit virtually to receive a free chapter on soul success at http://www.brightlightcoach.com

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Introducing Bright Michelle

May 13th, 2009 Jessica Posted in purposeful living | No Comments »

I would like to introduce my first guest blogger here at Live on Purpose. Michelle Casto is The Soul Coach, a Spiritual Teacher, and Modern-day Philosopher. I met Michelle through Twitter, and we’ve spoken on the phone a few times. It feels like we’re soul sisters, so I invited her to share some of her special knowledge on Purpose with my readers. She maintains her web site Bright Light Coach, where she offers her coaching services, ebooks, and articles.

I caught a radio interview Michelle did at Live Your Purpose at BlogTalkRadio, and you can hear her speak about her role as a soul coach here http://www.blogtalkradio.com/LiveYourPurpose .

If you click that link right now, on May 13, my name is at the top of the roster of archived interviews because I did the interview yesterday.  “Jessica Alvarez-Live on Purpose” is the title of the interview. Then Michelle Casto, also known as “Bright Michelle” is three interviews down.

If you listen to my interview, have patience with me, dear readers, because the written word is my favorite medium. Ask me to speak with an audience, and that’s another story! I feel nervous when I speak, and I’ll grow out of it through practice, but right now you can hear the “um, ah, um” and dead air as I frantically scan my brain for the right words to say.

Enough about me, it’s time to introduce Bright Michelle’s first post, coming right up!

P.S. I found the permalink to our internet radio interviews with Michelle Vandepas for Divine Purpose Unleashed:

Bright Michelle Soul Coach

Jessica Alvarez Live on Purpose

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Big News, Big Chat

May 11th, 2009 Jessica Posted in emotional guidance system, positivity, purposeful living, purposeful thinking | No Comments »

During the past several weeks, I have been introducing you to a few outstanding individuals who are doing big things towards living a purposeful life. Do you remember these two?

Michael Neill and his Genius Catalyst web site and Feel Happy Now book and movement.

Bill Cummins and his “What one person can do” program and Boothby Institute.

These two speakers will be leading a free webinar on Tuesday the 19th at 11 am pacific.  Don’t worry if you’re at work during that time, because a recorded audio will be sent to registered participants. I would like you to go register right now to hear these awesome speakers for free. Even if you can’t free your schedule during that time slot, go register. Here is the information about the call:

The Big Chat Presents…

a free, LIVE Webinar

with Michael Neil,  Bill Cumming and YOU
TUESDAY, MAY 19TH, 11am Pacific, 2pm Eastern

for a conversation about LIVING FROM THE INSIDE OUT

  • How does one need to think in order to be successful in any economy?
  • What is the key to feeling peaceful no matter what is going on around you?
  • What are the brilliant problem solving approaches used by two master coaches?

Based on questions about what is most important to you right now….

Register here for the Big Chat Webinar and you’ll get the webinar details and special code to join.

You can join via the web or phone and the call will include live Questions and Answers with two brilliant coaches!

This call will be recorded, and will be made available at no charge to everyone registered.

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